One-two-step

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sesungguhnya realiti itu tidak indah;

I remember the first batch of cupcakes that I’ve ever baked. White, plain old vanilla cupcakes without any icing or frosting on top. It was a big deal for me at the time because my mum ran a tight kitchen back home, and I was seldom allowed to ‘experiment’ in fear of making a mess and destroying things. So you can bet that once I went abroad to further my studies, the first thing I did was buy an oven and tried baking some cupcakes. 

It’s important to focus on the word ‘tried’ here because in life, we all set ourselves to do things, but sometimes they don’t work out in our favor. Trying saves you from that no-regret feeling and of course provides you with the comforting phrase of, ‘at least I tried.’

Tried to bake a cupcake.

Tried to make my own manga series.

Tried Dota casting.

Tried to write a book.

Tried applying for scholarships.

Tried corporate work. 

Tried volunteer work. 

It always looks easy at first, doesn’t it? Flipping through recipes, thinking confidently,

 “Pfft. I can do this. I can totally make this”

Then once the oven bell rings, you take out the tray and it looks like something from the Netflix show Nailed It! Then you wonder for a while what went wrong or how can something so simple end up being so difficult. 

“For one of us to make it through, 100 of us have to try.” 

-Ocasio-Cortez

You really are super damn well lucky or a hidden talent when you get something right the first time. And that’s the second reason why trying is so important in the first place. If you don’t try then you won’t ever know if something is made for you or not.    

Just like my first batch of cupcakes. They were pretty bland, a little hard outside and not fully cooked inside. The feeling sucked at first, but it wasn’t my last batch of cupcakes, that’s for sure. It’s these first experiences that make us really appreciate the skill and effort of professional bakers or pastry chefs like Zumbo. Even him I’m sure, once started with a batch of unperfected cupcakes. 

Regardless, its a step. And that in its essence is what trying is all about; taking the first step. 

First steps don’t have to be big ones. Little steps are also enough to take you somewhere. It will take more time definitely, but it still keeps you moving as long as you continue to take them. 

I took my first small step in academia by presenting my  undergrad paper at a conference in 2017. This led to an opportunity to submit my paper for a possible publication. Finally, after multiple revisions, and re-writes, two years later, the paper got published. I look back and thank God that I even decided to try and participate with my lack of experience at the time. 

While I can’t say the same for my baking endeavor, I can still whip up some pretty nice chocolate cupcakes with instant frosting and sprinkles on top for the occasional house party. 

That’s all it is really. One small step, leading to another small step, and another step, until it might reach a possible big step. Even if it doesn’t, it still keeps you going and is a step nonetheless. Just keep moving forward.  

Because, honestly,

Where else are you going to go?